Back to tinder

I only told a few of my friends that I'm actually on tinder - those I think they wouldn't judge me. Tinder is an app that is soooo infamous when it comes to hookups. Rest assured, I'm not crazy enough to go for that, though there were nuts asking.

So why I'm on that app? It's not like I don't have friends. I dunno. Maybe I'm just an attention seeker. Looking for someone that can prove my existence. I know this is my lack of confidence. If one is confident enough, he/she doesn't need to prove themselves constantly.

I hate myself being in this way. I'm not going to deny it, as this is part of me. I just need to find a way to stop being in this way. Some days, I'm determined to change. To stop tinder. But funny enough, I keep going back. Installed and uninstalled and re-installed. What am I doing really? Life has a lot more for me to explore rather than engage in some meaningless conversations with strangers.

I know. I'm too naive, thinking that I can get myself a boyfie from that fake world. Maybe there are people who are sincere like me from the start. But at the end, when you put too much trust in something you shouldn't, you would just end up being hurt. So the next when you met someone who is sincere but you don't trust easily again.

Why is love so difficult when it can be so easy? Why is everyone afraid to fall in love when all you can do is just learn how to love?

Stay tuned. I might have interesting stories to share next.