But probably I just write for myself to read. Since no one really care.
So, what to update for the first post of 2016? That a lot had happened in year 2015 and that first quarter of 2016 is about to come to an end and yet I feel like I had did nothing at all. What should I do with my life? My future?
So I changed job in 2015. Everything is so different from the previous job. I have never really set out my future plan or envision about it. Future, to me is a very abstract and unfamiliar word. They often said future is to be created, by me, myself. And I really have no idea about it.
As if it couldn't get more worse, I lost a 10 years long friendship. I dunno how.com we end up like this and the last conversation we had was she told me to move on. Okay, fine. Since she said so. But I know deep down, it really was my problem after all. I'm narrow-minded, bad temper, sucks at communicating. I dunno how to be good at communication. And I seem to have the ability to make everyone to leave my life. I'm really good at annoying, agitate, and ruining a relationship. Well, I learned my lesson, hopefully. I know in the near future, I'll be doing the same mistake all over again.
I told Alice, I've got an itchy mouth. Something I knew I shouldn't say, but the sentence keeps playing in my mind. At the end I was so frustrated, so I say it out loud and immediately regret for saying it.
p/s: My mind is such a mess now and I think the picture is most likely to describe how my mind is working now.
Photo: Lee JeeYoung
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